Things...I like

1. I love my dogs. I got them from the Humane Society. I wouldn’t give them up for the world. Therefore, I would like to request to the TV people that they cannot play any more dog or cat commercials from Sarah McLaughlin. I’ve done my duty. I don’t need to see your commercial without feeling as if I have to run out and adopt 13 more dogs and 10 cats. Thank you.

Sophie, diligently watching me go pee

Jada, very sleepy Jada

2. I like telling baggers or ringer-uppers to have a great day. I don't just say have a good day, but have a great day. I think it makes their day. And most of them are honestly surprised I’m not a total asshole like the rest of the people in line behind me.

3. I really like getting the trash out on time. I know the trash comes Thursday morning. I could certainly put it out the night before, but that would be way too hard. I hear the trash trucks in the morning and totally freak out because WE forgot to put the trash out. If not this week, hopefully I remember for next week.

4. Showing up to work before everyone else. I usually do that most days. But I think it’s great that my coworkers have no idea if I’ve been working hard for a half hour or five minutes.

5. I like having days off work. Isn’t that a given for most people? Totally. But I’ve been at my job for a long time, so I get a lot of time off. I TAKE A LOT OF TIME OFF.

6. I love Adele. I guess you realized that if you paid attention to my other post. I don’t like that the tickets to see her are like $400.00 apiece. Yikes. I didn’t know I had to take out a loan to see the girl perform.

7. Fall. My fav time of year. Nice days and cool nights. Perfect hot tubbing weather. Love the crunching of the leaves as I walk through my neighbors nice pile and fuck it all up.

8. Barry White. And when I say his name even in my head, I try to lower my voice to the level of smoothness he possessed. I think my voice sounds a little like a drag queen when I do this. His songs are sexy time songs. All of them.

9. When I let someone pull out in front of my car and the driver waves to thank me. I don’t care if you totally cut me off within an inch of slamming into my car. Your waving is all the thank you I need. And I appreciate it.

10. Love listening to opera music in my car. I try to sing with it. Which makes me sound like I’m dying a painful death, but it’s fun.

11. I like the silence I get when I tell people my last name over the phone. There’s always a pause or a chuckle. My last name has a part of the body that rhymes with MONER. No one like to say my last name or they will intentionally say it incorrectly after I’ve spelled in out for them. It’s a freaking riot.

P.S.

If you don't know what rhymes with MONER. I can't help you in life.